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Thread: Travian poetry corner

  1. #1

    Meherrin's Avatar
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    Default Travian poetry corner

    I know there was a haiku thread somewhere here the other day, but i can't find it and besides, it's a bit limiting. I thought we might have fun with all sorts of poetry, ideally with a Travian theme.

    My first contribution is in that lowliest and most maligned of poetic forms, the limmerick. I'm thinking of trying to write one for every Ancient City.

    There was a young girl from Tolosa
    Who cooked up a killer samosa
    She packed all she made
    On the back of a haed,
    And took them to sell in Formosa.


    There once was a Scythian granny
    Who stored all her goods in her cranny
    When asked why she did it
    She started to fidgit
    And blamed everything on her nanny.
    Last edited by Meherrin; 07-24-2014 at 11:53 PM.
    And now I'll tell you what's against us, an art that's lived for centuries. Go through the years and you will find what's blackened all of history. Against us is the law with its immensity of strength and power - against us is the law! Police know how to make a man a guilty or an innocent. Against us is the power of police! The shameless lies that men have told will ever more be paid in gold - against us is the power of the gold! Against us is racial hatred and the simple fact that we are poor.
    - The Ballad of Sacco and Vanzetti, Joan Baez

  2. #2

    Flossie Schmumpus's Avatar
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    At last....poetry even I can understand.


    Wait! Does this mean I am becoming cultured?
    Note:Any posts made by this poster should always be construed in the most innocent angelic way possible. The poster is not responsible for where your depraved minds go, if you have a depraved mind.

    Our Lady of Croppers ~Semper DOS~ ~Viva Toons~ || This area intentionally left blank. || The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity ~ Harlan Ellison

  3. #3
    kabooja's Avatar
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    You always were; it just lay dormant until now.
    ________________________________________________
    "What wisdom can you find that is greater than kindness?"
    Jean-Jacques Rousseau

  4. #4

    Meherrin's Avatar
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    There was a proud Cimbrian lord
    With more preats than he could afford
    They demanded their pay
    But he fed them on hay
    So the invading troops they ignored.
    And now I'll tell you what's against us, an art that's lived for centuries. Go through the years and you will find what's blackened all of history. Against us is the law with its immensity of strength and power - against us is the law! Police know how to make a man a guilty or an innocent. Against us is the power of police! The shameless lies that men have told will ever more be paid in gold - against us is the power of the gold! Against us is racial hatred and the simple fact that we are poor.
    - The Ballad of Sacco and Vanzetti, Joan Baez

  5. #5
    Artisan RycorAbsinthe's Avatar
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    Default

    Equites Imperatoris, much faster than his brother Caesaris
    A battle of wits is much to be weary us.
    Something about how I am

  6. #6

    Default

    Rycor woke, he saw, he wept
    'cause I came knocking while he slept
    cranny lacking
    warehouse cracking
    granary sacking
    Then out I crept
    US1R1 - BillW
    US3R1 - BillW (AeM)
    US2R5 - BillW (RoA)
    US2R6 - BringinSexyBack (PANDA)
    US2R7 - Dr. Bob (STD)
    US5R7 - Thanatos

    Sign your derps. Cackling hens, the lot of you.

    Quote Originally Posted by lethaljimmy View Post
    I am paid to rate people on their level of perfesionalism

  7. #7

    Flossie Schmumpus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kabooja View Post
    You always were; it just lay dormant until now.

    NOOOOoooooOOOOOOOoooooo! I wish to continue in life with no couth at all.
    Note:Any posts made by this poster should always be construed in the most innocent angelic way possible. The poster is not responsible for where your depraved minds go, if you have a depraved mind.

    Our Lady of Croppers ~Semper DOS~ ~Viva Toons~ || This area intentionally left blank. || The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity ~ Harlan Ellison

  8. #8
    Artisan RycorAbsinthe's Avatar
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    Bill had skillz that couldn't be matched
    Raids and attacks were all that he lacked
    He talked a big game and even some smack
    But come Christmas morn it was balls that he lacked.

    He huffed and he puffed to get that second villa
    Those culture points he lacked he couldn't buy with his skrilla.
    So he cried and he cried till he got what he wanted
    Only to find that a 15c was what he actually needed.

    (I'm bad at this....)
    Last edited by RycorAbsinthe; 07-25-2014 at 01:33 AM.
    Something about how I am

  9. #9
    Senator Cisalpine's Avatar
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    Teuts drool
    Romans are stool
    Gauls rule

  10. #10

    Default

    Cisary disary do
    What shall we do with you?
    You come here
    Sounding queer
    And you like Gauls too
    US1R1 - BillW
    US3R1 - BillW (AeM)
    US2R5 - BillW (RoA)
    US2R6 - BringinSexyBack (PANDA)
    US2R7 - Dr. Bob (STD)
    US5R7 - Thanatos

    Sign your derps. Cackling hens, the lot of you.

    Quote Originally Posted by lethaljimmy View Post
    I am paid to rate people on their level of perfesionalism

  11. #11
    Senator Cisalpine's Avatar
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    Alas, I have nothing
    That rhyme's been told
    Is actually quite old
    Now I'm reduced to cussing

  12. #12

    Default

    Oh Cisalpine, my Cisalpine
    Your rhymes they do decline
    From short and sweet
    To indiscreet
    At least you do not whine
    US1R1 - BillW
    US3R1 - BillW (AeM)
    US2R5 - BillW (RoA)
    US2R6 - BringinSexyBack (PANDA)
    US2R7 - Dr. Bob (STD)
    US5R7 - Thanatos

    Sign your derps. Cackling hens, the lot of you.

    Quote Originally Posted by lethaljimmy View Post
    I am paid to rate people on their level of perfesionalism

  13. #13
    Senator Cisalpine's Avatar
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    Borrowed for lack of ingenuity and time.....

    Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby
    Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around
    And then worst of all (worst of all) you never call, baby
    When you say you will (say you will) but I love you still
    I need you (I need you) more than anyone, darlin'
    You know that I have from the start
    So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart

    Sorry, not Travian related either. I'm a sorry excuse for a rhymer.

    Edit: I will dream of Travian and come back tomorrow bigger, better and stronger!

  14. #14

    Default

    There are oh so many trolls in these threads,
    And some that are just downright boneheads.
    It's all just a game,
    So get ready, take aim,
    And make those enemy troops fall down dead.
    us4r4 - 2puggles - TDS (REBELS)
    us6r4 - puggles - THC - harmless kitten attacks WW
    us4r5 - puggle braynes - TDS has stuff
    us2r6 - CareBearzerker - FEAR - WW Hit#1, #2, #3
    com7 - w8 4 it... - CWL - WW joins my empire
    us1r7 - puggles - MHU

  15. #15

    Default

    Kurtz has been banished,
    The trolls are all famished,
    Murdok brought tacos,
    But i prefer nachos,
    Kimmies been trollin,
    Shes better off bowlin,
    Sleepez is dreamin,
    Of the team he'll be needin.
    The server just started,
    I think Baron farted,
    Bill is a poet,
    But we didnt know it,
    Cis is so sweet,
    Lemme keep this on beat,
    The trolls are all reppin,
    But some im forgettin,
    I really am bored,
    Cause i joined the troll horde.
    S2R2: Myrok
    S2R3: Rok
    S7R?: Foulish
    S2R6: WeRock
    S1R7: Anvil

    cuchullain: Sorry, Roc is a bird dude. Rok is a giant mushroom.

    Quote Originally Posted by tiamat View Post
    the only infrastructure hit was the one built into the rammer of doom.
    Quote Originally Posted by lethaljimmy View Post
    And my clams have already been validated

  16. #16

  17. #17
    Artisan RycorAbsinthe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Myrok View Post
    Kurtz has been banished,
    The trolls are all famished,
    Murdok brought tacos,
    But i prefer nachos,
    Kimmies been trollin,
    Shes better off bowlin,
    Sleepez is dreamin,
    Of the team he'll be needin.
    The server just started,
    I think Baron farted,
    Bill is a poet,
    But we didnt know it,
    Cis is so sweet,
    Lemme keep this on beat,
    The trolls are all reppin,
    But some im forgettin,
    I really am bored,
    Cause i joined the troll horde.
    I am formally complaining to the mods right now that I can't plus rep that twice...
    Something about how I am

  18. #18
    Philosopher Hektur's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RycorAbsinthe View Post
    I am formally complaining to the mods right now that I can't plus rep that twice...
    Got em
    S3R1 - Hektur ~RoA~
    S1R3 - Hektur ~RoA~
    S6R2 - Slowdive Fuzz
    S2R4 - The Force ~RoA~
    S2R5 - Kronyk ~RoA~
    S2R6 - Stuffnsuch ~RoA~
    S2R7 - Arketeckt TDU

    Quote Originally Posted by Nimmo View Post
    you forget you have to say the word Hektur, 3 times in a mirror and THAT is when RK comes out.

  19. #19
    Senator Cisalpine's Avatar
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    A Gauling we will go, a Gauling we will go
    hi ho the merry-o a Gauling we will go

    stealin' all the rez
    the wheat, the clay
    the iron and the wood
    laughing as we fled......

    Our TTs couldn't be stopped
    So fast no one could hear a clop
    Mighty and fast they flew
    So fast,the mind - they blew
    Not that Teuts or Roman's have them (a mind)
    They're known to be a bit dim.

    Back to our cranny's we go
    stuffing them with our treasures
    tipping our steins so they flow
    while celebrating with our pleasures

    Suddenly from amid the celebration
    A scout comes running from his station.
    "There's Teut's on the way, 70,000 strong
    Everyone to your posts, they're sounding the gong."

    To their posts they flew, gearing up for a fight
    They knew it would be a very long night.
    They braced, they waited, cranny's guarded and sealed
    Glad that any that had been wounded were healed.
    Finally it came - the pounding, crashing,yet the palisade stood!
    Firm and strong, they couldn't breach the wood!

    Those that were near, died with great honor
    the losses were felt on both sides.
    The men tend their wounded and dead
    The women run to wipe faces and eyes.

    This night was a victory, the wall was not breached
    The few that climbed over, a Phalanx they did meet.
    Building and farming were back in action
    They couldn't afford to lose any traction.

    The captains, and chieftains all met round the fire
    Discussing the strategy and what would transpire.
    They toasted their luck, in the wall holding firm
    They now knew to focus on cats long term.

    Those silly Teuts, came with beef, but no brawn.



    ***Ehh. I tried. LOL

  20. #20

    Meherrin's Avatar
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    And now, for something a little more serious (though I shan't be forgetting my goal of writing a limmerick to immortalise every Ancient City).

    I offer the first canto of an ongoing work,



    The Ancienied

    Of cities most ancient I sing, that hold in hoard
    Great treasures rarely seen e're now, such powers,
    Such mystic magic, as would make a man
    Into a chief, a chief into a king,
    The fount of victory's golden gleaming crown -
    Yea, strewn from sea to sea, as gems they glimmer
    Whispering their tales of vanish'd glories
    Older than the minds of mortals now
    Recall, when mighty warriors bold with names
    Forgotten strode the world and ventured deeds
    That none among the living could o'ermatch -
    And still they call the best of us to battle,
    To strive against all others who would claim
    The greatest prize of all, to dare the odds,
    And seek to win the glorious name of Caesar,
    Emperor of the world.
    Last edited by Meherrin; 07-30-2014 at 04:00 PM.
    And now I'll tell you what's against us, an art that's lived for centuries. Go through the years and you will find what's blackened all of history. Against us is the law with its immensity of strength and power - against us is the law! Police know how to make a man a guilty or an innocent. Against us is the power of police! The shameless lies that men have told will ever more be paid in gold - against us is the power of the gold! Against us is racial hatred and the simple fact that we are poor.
    - The Ballad of Sacco and Vanzetti, Joan Baez

  21. #21
    Villager pugseviltwin's Avatar
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    There once was a team
    of two Ladies and a gentlemen
    with swords no one ever seen
    they were very genuine

    They had a lot of fun
    at killing everyone
    and when they were done
    everybody was stung !!!
    If i said it once , i will say it again , ANVILS are a girls best friend

  22. #22

    Default

    Mine is a villanelle.

    On a joyful server played with friends so dear,
    A spawn, a race, thus we begin
    Join us all, join us here


    We don our tags and drink our beer,
    Badger old mates until they're in
    On a joyful server played with friends so dear.


    On the forums, we laugh and jeer
    Have some spite, and have some gin
    Join us all, join us here


    Settling bountiful croppers, far and near
    Sometimes bouncing with chagrin
    On a joyful server played with friends so dear.


    On the screen crossed swords appear,
    The cavalry's called in.
    Join us all, join us here.


    Gather victory points with cheer
    Each team hopes to win
    On a server played with friends so dear,
    Join us all, join us here.
    Last edited by zenny; 07-27-2014 at 02:35 AM. Reason: There was a space where it didn't go.

  23. #23
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    Keep shutting us down
    Constant futile attempts
    We all laugh out loud
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  24. #24

    Default

    The spawn race is won
    Now the real fun can begin
    Here comes the carnage
    Calling out weak trolling since December 2012

    S1 R6 - Caesarum R7 - Carni R8 - Phantom
    S2 R8 - Storeythor
    S4 R8 - Carni
    S5 R5 - Blackbird R7 - BBC
    S8 R2 - Eazykills
    S19 R1 - Seba18

  25. #25
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    Got a nice pimped-out cropper
    Gonna have maaaad wheat
    Haters gonna hate
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  26. #26

    Default

    Attacked, got snacks.
    Scouted and pouted.
    Troops were dead, but the player sent me wheat for no apparent reason.
    *cymbal crash*

  27. #27
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    They like to huggle
    That strategy failed last time
    This dull world dissolves
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  28. #28

    Default

    When the server ends
    If you did not have some fun
    You are playing wrong
    Calling out weak trolling since December 2012

    S1 R6 - Caesarum R7 - Carni R8 - Phantom
    S2 R8 - Storeythor
    S4 R8 - Carni
    S5 R5 - Blackbird R7 - BBC
    S8 R2 - Eazykills
    S19 R1 - Seba18

  29. #29
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    Trolling with Haikus
    Just seventeen syllables
    I'll take my scotch neat
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  30. #30

    Default

    With this confusing spawn I thought I'd switch
    But then I bought into JoY's sales pitch
    Now my account is here to defend my team
    But my dreams of being a feared anvil may be a pipe dream
    The reality comes in this stich; my online time is limited by my wife, the -edited by mod-
    Last edited by ex--mod; 08-01-2014 at 06:06 AM. Reason: tsk, filter evasion

  31. #31

  32. #32

    Default

    The forums have done,
    nothing but get even worse.
    It's quite saddening.

    People bring up ****
    It's too personal. So I
    stick to poetry.
    Last edited by Carni; 08-01-2014 at 08:43 AM.
    Calling out weak trolling since December 2012

    S1 R6 - Caesarum R7 - Carni R8 - Phantom
    S2 R8 - Storeythor
    S4 R8 - Carni
    S5 R5 - Blackbird R7 - BBC
    S8 R2 - Eazykills
    S19 R1 - Seba18

  33. #33
    Banned.
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    Flossie is saucy
    She really pissed off me
    When the thread she did end
    Was left with an insult I couldn't defend

  34. #34
    Philosopher LuckyGurrl's Avatar
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    Troops, troops and more troops!
    That is the battle cry!
    Watch for traps-- Oops!
    Gotta kill that guy!
    or
    It's the luck of the draw.

  35. #35
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    I learned from the best
    Kurtz was better than the rest
    He was far, far worse
    At making flames burst

    ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssss

  36. #36
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    This infatuation with Erik
    indeed somewhat a puzzle
    we can all wish and hope
    Baron's master finds his muzzle
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  37. #37
    Tradesperson
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    Quote Originally Posted by b4dm0therf View Post
    Baron's master finds his muzzle
    I see what you did
    your avatar and message
    coincide nicely

  38. #38
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    pugs are the cutest
    impossible to muzzle
    snort snort lick lick snort
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

  39. #39

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by b4dm0therf View Post
    snort snort lick lick snort
    This right here wins it all, everyone else can go home.
    Calling out weak trolling since December 2012

    S1 R6 - Caesarum R7 - Carni R8 - Phantom
    S2 R8 - Storeythor
    S4 R8 - Carni
    S5 R5 - Blackbird R7 - BBC
    S8 R2 - Eazykills
    S19 R1 - Seba18

  40. #40
    Merchant b4dm0therf's Avatar
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    Simmy Simmy Sim
    The boredom drives me crazy
    Just want to break ****
    s1: The Dude
    s19: Venom


    Mods be all up on deeznutz

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